You Will Never Be A Stupid Mistake
by marianne-larsen
Summary: Summer started doing drugs and now shes back. What happened while she was gone? Is it too late for things to go back to the way they were? Should they go back to the way they were? SummerSethMarissa. Alittle Ryan there too, maybe more later. R&R!
1. Prologue

**Summary:** This is basically, not it actually just is a prologue and is more or less a summary in itself.

**Story Notes: **Although you might know me and my personal beloved ships, I'm a sucker for sad endings so don't be so sure of whose ending up with who. I'm not going to say more than this until I post the next chapter because.. well, that will ruin the prologue... ;P

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing. Not even the laptop I'm writing this on.

**Rating:** I have no idea where this story is going so I rated it T for the time being. It might go up and it might go down. I'm not sure.

Her smiles showed traces of true happiness. Her laughter the only honest one around. The way she flipped her golden hair over her shoulders made the whole room catch themselves staring in awe. There was just something about her. Marissa Cooper just had that thing. That thing that made everyone long to be around her, proud to say that they knew her, know that they were lucky to get to hear her happy returning their hellos. It made you wonder if she had ever experienced anything sad in her life. Made you wonder if all she had ever known was happiness and perfection? Because she looked like one of those girls. One of those girls that truly cared for other people and felt sad for them when bad things happened, although they had no way of relating themselves because everything had just seemed to magically go their way.

But Marissa wasn't one of those girls. She had gone through hell times and again. If you could think of it, Marissa had been through it. For those that knew this a smile on her face always made them smile themselves. If she could be strong and smile, so could they. No one could compare to the things that she had gone through. And kept going through. Because it never seemed to end.

It had seemed so. For a short while. It had seemed like the hard times were over. Like it was all going to be fine from then on and that Marissa would finally get a chance of happiness for a longer time in her life. To be honest, it had seemed so many times, but that time everything had changed and everything had been new. But that too, had ended.

It had been their second year at Brown. They had all winded up there. The girls because they were to scared to be alone, and the boys because they didn't want to live at different sides of the country. At least not yet.

Summer had turmoiled down into depression after it had turned out that everyone was better than her in everything. She had given up school and after meeting a guy named Deacon she had started hanging out with him and his group of friends more and more. It wasn't until one late Tuesday in October Seth had realized she had started doing drugs. He had tried to help her, make her realize that she could manage school, and everything else for that matter, if she just tried hard enough. She didn't even have to go to school, just quit the drugs. But Summer had been unable to reach, it had simply been to late. She had already cheated on Seth numerous of times and her feelings had gone numb. After desperately going to get her at Deacons place more times than he could count he had given up on her one day in early February. There was no way he could manage Summer and school at the same time any longer and frankly he had grown tired of it all. She demanded that she didn't need him anymore and he had finally came to the same conclusion himself. It had been hard, but Ryan and Marissa had helped him through it.

They would come over and get him out of bed every morning. They would help him do his homework and sometimes, they would do his homework for him. He had been numb himself after his break-up with Summer. Even thought about trying out some drugs himself, but seeing what they had done to Summer he knew he would never go that far.

Then one day, while the three of them were eating dinner. Ryan cut Seth off in the middle of another insult towards Marissas cooking. "I'm leaving", he had said and that had been all. They had all gone silent, all staring at their plates, and Ryan had continued talking. He had said that he had been offered a job to help design a new gigantic building over in Spain. Brown had allowed him to go and still keep his place in the school and it was all set for him to leave in three weeks. When Marissa asked why he hadn't told them about it before Ryan said that it was because he wanted to be sure first. Marissa had left the table silently and shut the door harshly behind her. Ryan had soon followed her and Seth heard their entire argument through the thin wooden bedroom door. He had wanted to get angry himself, to tell him that he couldn't leave. It wasn't as if he needed him desperately anymore, he was long over Summer and he had Marissa now. But still, Ryan would always be his best friend. Seth had known it wasn't up to him to ask him to stay though. And he knew Ryan well enough to know that this was something he had to do. Just like with Theresa. Although this time it was because Ryan saw his chance. His chance to make something of himself, and knowing where Ryan came from, he couldn't let that chance slip away.

Seth had smiled bravely at Marissa before waving at Ryan one last time three weeks later. As they watched his plane take off Marissa had seeked comfort in his shoulder and Seth had seeked comfort in her. Ryan and Marissa were over. It wasn't that they didn't love each other anymore, it was just that Ryan didn't know how long he would be gone and if they were meant to be, they would find a way to be together once he got back. Seth knew that now it was his time to be there for Marissa, like she and Ryan had been there for him.

Summer had been just around the corner and they had decided to go away together on vacation. They both needed to get away from Brown and all the memories that layed there of their long gone lovers. Marissa had surprised Seth happily one day with tickets to Thailand. When Seth had smiled excited back he had wondered what it would be like to kiss her.

Their two weeks away had been wonderful and had ended too soon for the both of them. They had spent long hours on the beach competing to get the best tan, they had danced the night away in the bars, wasted on things they had never even heard of before. There had been many hook-ups for the both of them, and they both felt alittle distant each time they saw the "Do not disturb" sign on the other persons door.

One day they had been eating lunch at a rather empty place and the waiter had asked them if they were there on their honeymoon. They had both laughed and said that they were only friends, but the look in their eyes while they talked about how silly it was gave away that they kind of had liked the question. The rest of the day they had more or less pretended to be a couple, not officially, but they smiles had been overly big and they had been openly more affectionate. Marissa even held his hand at one time and Seth wanted the whole world to see it.

It never left their minds that whole day, the thought about how it would be if they had actually been together. And as the alcohol had started to sink in, they had started talking about it in the back corner of Santa Mumba, their favorite pub. Marissa had dared him to kiss her and he had dared. Their kisses had gone on non-stop until they fell asleep in each other arms 4 oclock that same night. It wasn't until the next morning reality had hit them.

At first there had been alot of avoiding looks, feeling guilty and embarrassed. Then they had realized that they should be honest and say that they liked the idea. Two nights later they had both come to the same conclusion that they wanted to try to see how it would go. And so they did. They didn't regret their decision, at least not at that point in time.

If anyone had ever thought they were qualified to being called a "super couple", after meeting Seth and Marissa they had to think again. They just fit together perfectly, like two puzzle pieces, yin and yang, boy and girl. Marissas fear of being left and hurt Seth saw and made her forget. Seths insecurities Marissa made sure were long gone. She made him feel like no man could compare to him in her eyes, and he knew it was true. He made her feel like she was finally safe from hurt and betrayal, and at the moment it was true. At least he intended it to be so.

Then, at the fourth of November, Summer came knocking at their door.


	2. Chapter 1: You Make It Easy

**Chapter Summary:** Nothing really happens, this chapter is just more or less to give you an idea of how everyone is doing and an idea for what's to come and why it will happen.

**Story Notes: **I've decided that each chapter will be named after an Air song.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything. Except for Annabella maybe. And Professor Martin. They are both creatures of my imagination.

**Rating:** Rated T for now.

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Chapter 1: You Make It Easy

Seth Cohen sighed heavily and put his book down. He couldn't read, he couldn't focus. It was the effect Marissa had on him. Whenever a book or whatever text would turn slightly romantic his mind would wonder off to Ms. Cooper. He would imagine different scenarios with her. Sometimes sexy, sometimes just settings of everyday life. Sometimes he thought about things that had happened and sometimes he just thought about how much he cared about her. How much he loved her.

"What are you smiling about?", Marissa laughed coming over from the kitchen, sitting down next to him on the couch. "Oh, nothing", he smiled at her with that smile that told her that if he had his way she wouldn't be getting much sleep tonight. She just laughed and shook her head. "Your just so...", she couldn't come up with anything to say, ".. so you", she gave up. Seth just leaned over and kissed her, and she kissed him back. And they did, in fact, not get much sleep that night.

It always suprised Marissa how ucomplicated her relationship with Seth were. At least compared to her relationship with Ryan. Wich would pretty much included all her relationships throughout High School except for her relationship with Luke, because the rest had really all been about Ryan when it came down to it. But her relationship with Seth was different. It was so easy. He made it so easy just to like him and let that be that. He made her feel safe, made her feel like part of a unison. Like it was the two of them, no matter what, and that she didn't need to find back up so that she was sure she wouldn't be lonely. Because that's what Marissa was the most afraid of, being alone. So she always made sure that that never happened. But now she didn't worry about it too much anymore, she didn't feel like she needed too. Because Seth would never leave her. At least she didn't think he would. It wasn't like the future was etched in stone. But at the moment she felt confident. Confident that her relationship with Seth would keep it's strong pace at least into the next year and then some. So Marissa Cooper didn't worry anymore, Marissa Cooper was happy, she was content, happy to live in the moment. For once.

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Summer Roberts was her name. It had been her name her whole life and it had remained so the last year. But where had Summer Roberts gone off to? Because she didn't know. She didn't really remember much, and it broke her heart that she didn't. All she could remember was bits and pieces. Things like waiting up in the middle of nowhere next to a trashed out road, things like sneaking into the train station after hours to find somewhere to sleep, things like having sex with guys she didn't want to have sex with just to score a fix. It hurt like hell that she had lost so much of a whole year of her life, but considering the things she did remember, Summer wasn't sure if she just might be better off not knowing the rest. Maybe she should be thankful that she had forgotten so much. All she knew was that it was over, hell was finally over and she was going to start over again.

A soft knock on her door caught her attention and she looked up into her father's caring eyes. At first he had been disappointed in her. But he had never let her forget that he still loved her, and that had helped her through rehab so much he didn't even know. Summer smiled back at him and walked over and gave him a hug. She was happy to see him. "Are you ready?", he asked her, looking to see if her bags were packed. And they were. She was all ready to go home. She was so ready to finally go home.

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Ryan wondered sometimes if he had made the right choice. If he had made the right choice to leave everything behind to go to Spain. It was stupid to wonder about it, looking at how far he had come. Of course he did the right thing, at least when it came to his career. But what about his love life? Could he ever be fulfilled, happy, without Marissa? All his new friends saw him as the guy with the perfect life. He was the boss of own company and were doing great, he had a huge mansion with his own private beach, he had numerous of expensive cars, he had a model girlfriend and life was just loving him right now. But was he loving it the way he should be? When the thought ever so often crossed his mind he would shake it off. It was just in his head. He could be completely content without Marissa, it was just his enourmous gene for wondering what could have been. But he didn't care about that, at least he should care about that. He loved his job, his house, his friends and his girlfriend. The regrets could wait.

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"What did he do? He told them off, that's what he did!", professor Martin waved his arms eagerly. The whole class laughed, as did Marissa. She loved Professor Martin's classes, he was always so passionate about what he was teaching, he was truly devoted to making his students learn something, wich made her want to be devoted to learn it as well. And she did learn alot from him. A whole lot. She had never thought history class could be this much fun. She looked over at Seth, sitting next to her. He had an amused grin on his face as well, eyes completely focused on Martin and what he was saying. He was playing with his pen, clicking it. The class laughed again and Seth did too. He looked over, hopeful to catch one of Marissa's gourgeous laughs, but looked into her smiling eyes instead. The smile on his face just spread wider and he kissed her. "Well.. what do we have here? Two lovebirds, huh?", Martin raised an eyebrow and suddenly Seth and Marissa had the attention of the whole auditorium. Slighlty embarrased Marissa removed her hand from the lock she had shared with Seth through the whole class. Seth noticed. Martin just shook his head and laughed, "No no, don't be embarrased, you should be proud. Finding love is hard these days, or so I've heard. I've been married for 40 years so I haven't really been out there", he winked at his class, maybe revealing alittle too much. "Martin's a player!", someone yelled from the back and the whole class laughed again. Seth and Marissa as well. Marissa's hand found it's way back to Seth's and his lips found the way to the top of her head and their eyes found the way to each others. Seth smiled at her before turning back to paying attention to Proffesor Martin, gently stroking her hand with his thumb. And altough Marissa found Martin's classes highly entertaining, the rest of the class was just a daze. All she ever remembered was the feel of Seth's thumb brushing against her hand. That, and her thoughts about what she wanted to do with him once class was over.

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Coming home was not anything like what she had imagined. Sure, at first it had been exciting. Heck, anything would have been exciting compared to that jail she had been stacked up in for the last two months. But after a few days, after cathcing up with all her friends, her fathers friends. After getting used to her room again, and all that surrounded her, she felt that something was missing. And she knew what it was. Newport wasn't what it used to be, not when the people that made it what it was wasn't there. Nothing mattered like it used to. She didn't care about how she looked or how she presented herself, because there was noone there to impress. Nobody she wanted to get the attention of. So Summer got herself together one day late October and realised that to prevent herself from spinning down into depression one more time, she had to go get back what she needed. And if that didn't work, it would give her closure. Wich was what she needed in order to move on. She had to know what had happened, how things were now. Summer felt confident though, Cohen had always loved her. And she had always truly believed him when he told her that he always would. In her universe, the chances of getting him back, and everything else in order as well, were good. So Summer packed up a bag with her best clothes and shoes and hit the road. She wanted to drive up to Minnesota, to Brown College, if not only to have a car to drive around once she got there, but also to clear her head.

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Ryan pulled up at his house. He had decided to take a early day. The warm european sun made it a bright day and the light breeze swept caressingly over his face. He heard the waves crashing in the distance. "Annabella?", he was looking for his girlfriend, but he didnd't find her anywhere. After changing into more comfortable clothes than his work suit he found her. From looking out into the distance from his balcony he saw her down at the beach, the wind flowing through her long dark hair. She had seen him too and was waving. Ryan smiled. Why was he so worried? He was happy. He loved Annabella, she seemed to love him. Doubting that this all was a good thing was stupid. He must have inherited some sort of self destructive gene from Seth. Not that he knew how that were to have happened. Maybe it was the food? Maybe it was the bagels? He laughed, amused at the thought as he walked down the stairs leading down to the beach. His house was on the top of some hills wich gave him a good view. Once he reached the sand Annabella was running towards him, all wet from swimming in the warm water. She hugged him tightl, rubbing up against him, deliberately making him wet. Ryan just laughed and decided to play along. He picked her up and ran out into the water with his clothes still on and dropped her when he found some place safe to do it. Annabella just laughed and splashed some water on him. Her laughter made him smile.


End file.
